A Walk to Remember

Allow me to preface this story with a message to those people who walk their dogs and have no control over them- I'M SORRY. I used to judge you and your arms, which I assumed were weak and atrophied. Too scrawny to handle a lab? HA! Get to the gym, slackers. That's what I used to think. Until I met Major.


He is enormous. And strong. He is the Jethro Bodine of dogs. 


Major is my mom's boyfriend's dog. I have been the victim of Major incidents before last week. I've been to Howie's (mom's boyfriend) house many times. I've been hit in the leg with bruise causing tail wags. I've been almost knocked over by the rambunctious dog bounding through the house. But I'd never taken him for a walk. Until last week.


Howie went out of town and asked us to watch/walk Major. 'No problem!' I said cheerily while my mother gave me a look of warning.


The first few nights Howie was away, my mom walked Major. I had late work nights and by the time I got home my mom would have already walked him and would be recovering on the couch with an ice pack on her shoulder and a weary look on her face. 'Ha!' I would say. You're not strong enough to walk a DOG?


Then, we got home at the same time one night. 


The conversation went like this;


Mom- 'Let's get some exercise! I need to walk Major.' 


Taylor- 'Okay, that sounds fun on this crisp winter night!' 


Mom- 'Do you want red, white or champagne?' 


{what, you don't drink while exercising?}


Taylor- 'Champagne. Duh.' 


Mom- 'Perfect. We'll walk to Howie's house, pick up Major, re-fill our champagne and walk home with the dog.' 


We did just that. Let's just say that the first part of the walk was more enjoyable than the second. 


There was lots of arm jerking, yelling and champagne spillage. Never okay. 


When we got back, my mom decided that she needed a photo shoot with the dog. 


These photos make me pee my pants EVERY time I look at them. They are hilarious and show Major's personality so well. 


Cheers!