MLK Music Monday!

Happy MLK Jr day to ALL!

Let us remember

ALL

of the important people who have

worked SO hard for

equal rights for everyone.

Let us not forget the difficult fight we

still have to make sure all are

treated equally.

**please click here for more thoughts on this subject****

Confession

I wore my ratty Rainbows to work EVERY day last week. 

GASP!

What were they going to do, 

fire me? 

Muah ha ha.

Day 2 of funemployment is 

going very well. 

:) 

I give myself two more days until

I go totally stir crazy 

and rearrange all of the furniture in my house. 

Music Monday

Jumping Back In

I swim.

 I’ve been swimming since I can remember.

 I spent a lot of time in the pool and in the ocean as a child for fun and also swam competitively on and off from when I was 4 until I was 17. In high school I started swimming long distance. After the competition was over and I graduated from high school, long distance swimming became very therapeutic for me. 

It’s my yoga.

 It calms me and centers me. 

When I was on my mountain, going to school, I just had to go swim and my memories of home all came back to me. I always joke with my mom that the smell of bleach reminds me of my childhood because she was so neurotic about cleaning, but it’s really the chlorine smell from indoor pools that ‘take me back’ to Long Beach. 

To the indoor Olympic pool

 where I spent so much time swimming laps.

 I like to think of my life in terms of swimming. Whether I feel like I’m in a huge ocean trying to find my ground or whether I’m swimming laps, going back and forth, learning through repetition, traveling the same road until I finish the job. Like Dory (and Julie) say, ‘Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.’

I moved to Phoenix from Flagstaff because I was in a negative cycle in Flagstaff. 

I was trying to 

go to school full time, 

work full time

 and also trying

 to go out full time

 with all of my great college friends. 

After a few semesters of

 dropping classes, 

failing classes, 

paying out of state tuition 

and working too much I burned out. 

I decided to move to Phoenix as a next step. 

My goal was to find a 

‘big girl’ 

job and to get in a place financially where I could go back to school to finish my degree and move onto a fulfilling career in a field I really care about.

Three years later (almost three years to the day, actually) I find myself still in Phoenix (I NEVER thought I would be here that long) and itching for a change.

In the three years I’ve spent here,

 there have been

 many 

many 

storms that have made my water

dark and choppy.

 There have been an unfair amount

 of deaths, 

some financial issues, 

a condo purchase, 

awesome friends made, 

many lessons learned 

and original goals have been ignored.

Through all of these changed the long and strong 

(that is what my swim coach called it) 

swim stroke I moved here with that allowed me to glide through the water with ease and graceful movement became short and ineffective. 

I wasn’t moving through the water as easily or effectively. Then, more things happened and I just stopped swimming altogether.

 I floated around for awhile. 

I watched. 

I let the water move me where it wanted to. 

I let it move me toward more sadness and anxiety and instead of swimming away from those feelings and those areas of my life I just

 let

 the 

waves 

push 

me. 

I became totally immobile. 

Unable to look at the bad habits and self destructive behavior I was quickly floating toward,

 just watching people swim by me. 

Instead of starting to swim again, 

I tried to distract and busy myself with more tasks. 

I thought that if I added more to my life I would feel more fulfilled and needed. 

I took on a part time job

 and took on a huge charity project

 in addition to

 my full time job

 and part time tutoring gig.

 But when you’re in already

 choppy water 

and add more things to your life,

 you

 SINK.

 I sunk.

 Deeper and deeper

 into my sadness and anxiety. 

I sunk so deep that 

I didn’t think I 

could see the light

 at the surface of the water anymore. 

I stopped breathing and stopped caring. 

I went so deep that others 

could no longer see my usually bright light.  Everything in my life has been affected.

 My health, 

my happiness, 

my free time, 

my JOB. 

The job I never really wanted. 

The job I have had for THREE YEARS.

 The job that has defined me for those three years. 

The job I neglected when 

I took on so many other activities. 

The job that became a

 bad fit 

for everyone involved. 

The job that provided me with

 financial security and 

health insurance 

and a 401k. 

The job that I quit right 

before Christmas

 despite the job market 

and economy 

and my better judgment 

and the guilt I feel 

when I leave or say no to ANYTHING.

 Today was my 

last

 day 

at work and I feel 

SO 

much better about my life. 

Thank you

 for sharing your 

I Believe 

lists with me. 

They helped SO much when

 I was sad and torn about

 the decisions I needed to make. 

I feel like I’ve 

swum to the surface, 

have gotten rid of the 

biggest weight 

I was trying to hold onto

 and salvage. 

I’ve climbed out onto 

solid ground so that I can

 regain some perspective

 and reassess my goals. 

My next accomplishment. 

I don’t know what it is yet,

 but I’m ready to find it 

and I’m ready to jump back 

into the water 

so that I can get there

 with confidence and strength. 

I’m ready to swim. 
**photo credit: we heart it

Steph Believes!

Today's post is from my looooong time work bff, Stephanie. 

Stephanie and I met in college where we were both in the same sorority, 

Delta Delta Delta.

{let the SNL jokes begin}

We nannied for the same family throughout college

and when I heard that she was moving from Colorado to Arizona I 

knew she would be a great fit in the new company I worked for.

We also have super strange family real estate in common. 

My mom's house and her grandparent's house are BLOCKS from each other

on a little island in Long Beach 

and my grandmother lives in the same small town 

near Yosemite where her family has a ranch.

Weird, right?

The last photo is of Stephanie and I on vacation with

the family we nannied for in college. 

It's one of my favorite photos from one of my 

favorite places! 

{don't worry, the kids were with their parents}

I believe in…

I believe it the beach, but not the sandy part because that part is annoying.

 I believe in windows down and AC up.

I believe in dogs, and that they all go to Heaven.

I believe in family, family and more family.

I believe in drunken games… such as 3 legged races. (Drunken family games are even better)

I believe that there are no mistakes and bad decisions are all part of the learning process of life.

I believe in order to learn you have to live and in order to live you have to get hurt.

I believe in Schooners of Coors Light.

I believe that morals are the most important thing you can share with others.

I believe in a good time.

I believe in keeping the great outdoors great.

I believe in optimism and no bad days.

I believe in hot pool days in the summer and cold snowy days in the winter.

I believe in live music…

I believe in pitchers of beer and outdoor patios.

I believe that best friends are here for life.

I believe in Disneyland and all it’s magic.

I believe in red wine and white wine, but I do not believe in pink wine and you will never convince me otherwise.

I believe that the answers are out there somewhere, you just have to keep looking.

JULIE Believes!

I am very excited for today's post, because it is from my BFF Julie. 

She is so very wonderful and I hope that you all get

 to know her through her blog, Kiefer Love.

Stay tuned on Saturday because the Kiefers are 

going to be my Saturday Someones! 

I believe in good manners, thank you notes, and Emily Post.

I believe it is a woman’s prerogative to change her mind and her hair

I believe in miracles, heaven, and God…and that if you want to make the big guy laugh, then tell him your plans.

I believe there are no greater guilty pleasures than pedicures and bad television.

I believe that you just cannot fix stupid, but you CAN educate ignorance. On that note, I believe that there is no stronger investment than education.

I believe in person-first language and doing your best not to judge.

I believe in self-knowledge, self-examination, and taking through your problems…I am a psychologist after all!

I believe that among the greatest comforts are a fresh sheets, home cooked meals, and a glass of wine with a best friend.

I believe in good grammar and that sometimes curse words are a much-needed necessity.

I believe that our lives all have their own personal soundtrack and I believe in loudly singing and dancing along to them…specifically in the car and the shower.

I believe in maintaining a positive attitude and, yes, that smiles are contagious.

I believe in being patriotic and supporting our troops and the president, even if he is not a part of your political affiliation.

I believe in generativity, charity, making a difference in the lives of others, and giving more than you take.

I believe that most of the problems we are so stressed about really are NO BIG DEAL and sometimes the best things to do with these issues is to “Scarlet O’Hara” them to tomorrow.

I believe in miracles and I believe in karma.

I believe that the keys to a happy marriage are random acts of kindness and rarely saying, “No” to one another.

I believe to thine own self be true and that if you have to fake it until you make it…you probably don’t want to end up there anyway.

I believe “an ounce of pretension is worth a pound of manure.” (I believe in quoting movies)

I believe in the power of friendship and doing the work to maintain them even with busy schedules and life happening, because you never know when you will need a friend.

I believe in the goodness of all children and the power of good parenting.

I believe that families should sit down together at the dinner table.

I believe in getting things off your chest and being allowed to have grumpy and/or snarky moments.

I believe that laughter is the best medicine, but that a good cry is often a much-needed indulgence.

I believe that I believe in many things and talk too much!

I believe that this was a great exercise for me…it reminded me of my priorities and the person I strive to be in 2010.

Thanks, Tay Tay. You are definitely an asset to my abbey. J

 Thanks for playing Jules! 

I love you so much. 

Thanks for being my BFF.

What?!?!

Vince Vaughn got married??!!!

But, I was going to marry him.

Kind of rude, Vince.

**i don't have a photo credit because i was too busy crying hysterically to notice which website i jacked it from**

Nicole Believes

Today's list is from my new favorite blogger. 

Her name is Nicole, she is from South Africa but 

lived in London for a long time. 

So glam, right? 

She is back in SA and has SUCH a cute blog that it is difficult to believe 

that she just started it.

Be sure to head over to show her some blog love. 

• I believe that the universe will never throw something at us that we can’t deal with / pull through the other side. We are all stronger than we know
• I believe that writing 5 things in my gratitude journal every night makes me wake up a nicer person in the morning
• I also believe that without a massive cup of super strong coffee first thing, no amount of night-time gratitude musings will help my personality J
• I believe everyone deserves a second chance at everything
• I believe that a hug is the best way to resolve any argument
• I believe that one day I will resolve all my issues surrounding marriage & say yes (finally) to a proposal ..
• I believe that freshly cut grass is the best smell in the world
• I believe that Everything Bagels (in NYC) are probably the best thing I have ever had in my mouth
• I believe that its not that the city is especially romantic (ie Paris) but its down to the person you choose to go with.
• I believe that everything feels better after a good nights sleep
• I believe that you should surround yourself with people who make you feel amazing & ditch the ones who drag you down
• I believe that life should be fun, all the time. And if it’s not you should change it.
• I believe that having dogs is a sure fire way to include some unconditional love in your life. 

Music Monday

I've probably listened to this 197 times in the past two weeks. 

Adele, I love you for singing this. 

Bob Dylan, I love you for writing this. 

ps... this is my 200th post. kinda fun, right?

Spaghetti

Did you know that today is national Spaghetti day?

Well, now you do.

I love celebrating official food days. 

Food tastes more legit on those days.

Kathy Believes

Today's list is from Kathy.

She is one of my in person friends,

 but she is kind of more of a blog friend?

She used to work at the company I work for

and we met at a mutual friend's birthday dinner.

She mentioned her blog, I'd just started mine, and

the blog/facebook love began!

Check out her family blog ESPECIALLY if you have little girls.

She does really cool stuff with their hair.

{Kathy, I couldn't get the photos you sent me to work, so I stole this one from your facebook :)}

I believe in team sports

I believe that children should say their prayers out loud.

I believe in speed limits…you need to drive AT LEAST that fast.

I believe in cheap sunglasses.

I believe red lights are for texting.

I believe Christmas cards and wedding invitations should have photos.

I believe a hot scotch (hot chocolate & butterscotch schnapps) is WAY better than soup on a cold day.

I believe in putting towels under car seats.

I believe limes are better than lemons in water.

I believe bicycles are for children and should only be ridden on side streets, or (even better) cul-de-sacs.

I believe in sisters.

I believe in bibs.

I believe in 99¢ stores.

I believe all little girls should wear bows.

I believe nobody’s perfect.

I believe everyone should own an apron.

I believe in family.

Thanks for playing my game!

This is the last week for *I believe* entries, so if you'd like to participate

email your list to me soon!

Ltkalander@gmail.com

Wishing you....

.......a happy Sunday! 

I just had delicious brunch at Postino with my friend Tony, the lightrail blogger. 

{If you scroll to November 6th on Tony's blog you'll find a post with me in it!}

Then, we headed to the Biltmore fashion park for a lovely hour of browsing the shops. 

 We people watched for hot dads and cute babies while eating delicious MoJo.

Have you smelled the new rose potpourri at 

Pottery Barn? 

It's to die for. 

I couldn't leave without a bag. 

p.s. I have a sassy new haircut

**photo was stolen from the Postino facebook page 

Vieja

I just wanted to let everyone know

that I am sitting at home

on a Saturday night

watching Wheel of Fortune

and doing a cross word puzzle.

By choice.

If you don't hear from me for awhile it is probably because I've broken my hip.

Because I am

NINETY.

*photo credit